This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
We had sex on a dog bed..
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
