i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
