dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
