Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
