i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
