If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Randomize
