your room smells of hookers.
And success
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Randomize
