I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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