Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
