He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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