so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
