so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize