Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
