Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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