So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
