I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i came on her dog
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
