i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I checked into jail on foursquare
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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