Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
