Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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