i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
