I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize