Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize