sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
