Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize