Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
