I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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