i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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