we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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