i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
