I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
How's work?
Spinning.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
