You're so nebulous sometimes
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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