I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
