I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize