like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize
