The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
