You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
