Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She's the barista slut.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
