I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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