I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
