I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
