marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize