We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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