u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Your penis caused this!
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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