I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize