whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
