He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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