He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
