They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
