My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Randomize
