highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
