I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
